October 24, 2016

If life was the movies playing in my head...

Let's not stay here tonight.
Let's not pack but let's leave.
Let's go away from the places that keep screaming back all our fears and travel together to another land of innocent dreams.
Let's dance wherever we may stop.
Let's laugh, let's be silly, let's get mad and be sad as we know life is always this tragic adventure.
Let's travel the world until there are no places left to discover and there are no more secrets inside us to uncover.
Come away with me and let's believe, just this time, that the world can be made simple again... 
Maybe, just this once, there won't be any heart at stake... 
Maybe, this single time, love will be more than a hateful place... 
Maybe... 
Maybe, my darling, this will be the day that is the beginning of all our days!

October 14, 2016

Contradiction Affliction

Sweetheart, why do you think it took me so long to remember what took longer to forget? 

It feels like a trial at times, when I find myself falling for the same emptiness again... would it be easier to nurture the loneliness?

I sit here, broken wings, same patched heart, waiting and wading for someone that won't believe when I say there's no saving me. There isn't.

Don't get me wrong, my honeybear, just hear what I usually can't pronounce... it's not that I'm afraid, it's just that I can, for once, see what's real and I find myself crawling away with the desire you carry inside. 

You see?! Salvation comes in form of a conflict I can't seem to resolve. Contradiction is an affliction I'm not able to escape.

I want to finally pull my head up and avoid the shadows that a cursed soul left behind... avoid the blow I feel over and over again, when the past insists in coming back to take him and leave me, belly down, in this late years, fighting the wars he left me in. 

I want to be cast out of the shade by an unknown hand warmed by the light of this failing silhouette, drunk on the sadness of a world of might-have-beens.

I want, dear stranger, for you to disarm me and take me where the fire doesn't have to be made of my own hunger. I'll be your ghost playing outside of vision, somewhere in the mists of devotion and like a ripple, I'll appear, I'll live and I'll rejoin this darkened abyss...

... Or I'll just want to shelter myself forever, from the certain madness a stranger's salvation brings... protecting my crippled existence from  this yearning for everything that did me wrong. 

It's inconsistent, I know... Eternal masochism it's what I see!

I hear the crazy ones calling it love... And that's when I know I, too, have turned insane.